Laughter as Armor and Shield

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#OpenBook

What’s the one thing guaranteed to make you laugh?

Hmm…

Tough question. Is the laughter a sarcastic “you’re an idiot” or a full-hearted “that was hilarious” type of thing?

I laugh for so many reasons, not all of which involve anything being funny. Like when my former boss and her supervisor had me in the office jeopardizing my job because their friend/co-worker didn’t like that I ignored her unprofessional email tantrum.

The woman didn’t appreciate that I was not immediately motivated to stroke her volatile ego or placate her self-induced indignation. Grown folks had things to do. As retribution, I became targeted by her and her buddies in a toxic campaign to first make me uncomfortable then try to get rid of me.

Petty drama on top of petty drama culminated into a witchfest cloaked as a “team meeting” towards conflict resolution. Yeah, I didn’t buy it back then either.

As I sat at a round table with the coven, I laughed with them and their lame passive-aggressive attempts at whit despite the absence of humor.

My nerves will almost always send me into the chuckles. I  usually will at least grin harder than necessary for the situation. If things get too tense, I will titter like a school girl, finding any little thing funny.

There is a lot of gravity in life. Heavy things that will crush a person into a fine powder of hopelessness, blown away on the wind of regrets. Nice hyperbole, right? Except—it’s not. Things are hard, and when we seem determined to make them harder for no credible reason, I tend to laugh it off as a matter of survival. Continue reading “Laughter as Armor and Shield”

#OpenBook: Smell That? The Stench of Child Sexual Abuse

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If your childhood had a smell, what would it be?

One of the things most people remember about their childhoods is the scrumptious mixture of scents of a well-cooked meal at home. The revel in memories of swirls of seasonings in the warm air wrapping them in comfort.

Well, that would not be the smell of my childhood—not totally. For me, caustic fumes of abuse defiled such wonderful aromas, threatening to completely choke out my humanity.

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Continue reading “#OpenBook: Smell That? The Stench of Child Sexual Abuse”

#OpenBook: Half-Charged and Ready to Go!

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#OpenBook How do you recharge?

I’ve spent most of the past twenty years of my life running on fumes. I became a mom to my beautiful daughter in 1998—and never slept again!

Well, I slept, but not much because her brother was born the following year. AND the babies kept coming. By the time my oldest was five, I had my fourth baby and forgot what having a good night sleep or a relaxing day was.

If that wasn’t enough, my dumb…self decides to go to college and finish a few degree programs—work—engage in community organizing, and have two more babies. Throw freelance writing and authorship (writing, publishing, promoting, etc.), and relaxing is truly an alien thing for me. Continue reading “#OpenBook: Half-Charged and Ready to Go!”

#MFRWAuthor- Anger & Food: A Deadly Combination

Stress Eating: The Whys and Wherefores

Anger is the main emotion that makes me stress eat. I will be basically cool with life and eating decently—then BOOM!

Papa Bear or one of his male cubs do some man shenanigans…the little ones act up…someone on social media tries it with me—and I am heading for the kitchen.

Anger increases my appetite like a forest fire, and I consume food like flames old tree logs.  I tend to rationalize the need for my greediness. I tell myself that I “deserve” a treat and it will help me relax.

I tend to look for something sweet first. I don’t drink, smoke or do drugs. Sugar is my primary addiction.

Continue reading “#MFRWAuthor- Anger & Food: A Deadly Combination”

OpenBook-Grand Delusions of Global Change

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#OpenBook

What have you done to make the world a better place?

Nothing. Seriously. I’ve done nothing to make the world a better place, and neither has anybody else.

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This planet is vast with numerous societies and cultures. No one person can make everything better for everyone. We can positively influence our social spheres and may even have some impact on others, but never in totality.

That’s not life or the world works.

That being said, there are things I’ve done to try and affect positive shifts in cultural mindsets in ways that increase the potential for positive change. Continue reading “OpenBook-Grand Delusions of Global Change”

OpenBookBlogHop-Layla Writes Love 2019 Goals

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#OpenBook

Share your writing goals for 2019.

Mis Quince Años

I’ve been asking writers and authors to share their 2019 writing goals all last week.

I reached out to romance authors and ask them to tell readers some of their goals for this year, and I did the same for Muslim authors on the NbA Muslims blog on Patheos.

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It was great reading what authors and writers had planned as well as including some of my goals. I also took a moment to take part in an Instagram author’s challenge post.

 

I’ve been busy planning and goal making. So, I’m going to use this Open Book Blog Hop post to round up all of the goals I made and maybe add a couple of more.  Here we go! Continue reading “OpenBookBlogHop-Layla Writes Love 2019 Goals”

Things More Important than Names

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What do you want people to remember about you?

From the time I was very young, I’ve heard people expressing a desire or encouraging others to “make a mark” in the world or “leave a legacy.” The notion is usually associated with doing something on a grand scale to ensure that one’s name is not forgotten. However, I think we get sidetracked by the “name” part of people remembering us. Continue reading “Things More Important than Names”

Damsels and Beetles – When Fear Trumps Fierceness

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#OpenBook Blog Hop

I know many people see me as the stereotypical strong Black woman who ain’t scared of nothing, but I have my fears, and this week’s Open Book question come me feeling all kinds of creepy. Like really? We had to go there?

This fear of mine causes me to experience a heap of ridicule from my husband and sons. They laugh their butts off while I’m yelling for them to come and rescue me from this abysmal pest.

It happens at least once a summer. I’m chillin’ in my bed; it’s usually dark with maybe the tv or computer running—or both #multitasker. Then a clickclickclick begins to permeate the room. My heart rate ratches up; riveted to my spot, I usually peer at the ceiling, searching for the horrible intruder filling me with dread. Continue reading “Damsels and Beetles – When Fear Trumps Fierceness”

Papa Bear’s Porch Seat

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#OpenBlogHop

In this week’s Open Blog Hop, writers are asked to describe their favorite piece of furniture and any story there might be behind it.

My favorite piece of furniture isn’t because I enjoy it but because the man that I love and share my life with does. I affectionately call him Papa Bear on social media because he prefers that I don’t use his full name. I also like it.

I’m blessed with 27 years of marriage to a man that works damned hard for his family’s security. Continue reading “Papa Bear’s Porch Seat”

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