Death on a Calendar


If you had the option to know the date of your death, would you want to know?

Death is something that we as humans generally avoid like—well—death. We spend an incredible amount of time, energy and money during our waking hours keeping the Big Sleep at bay.

It motivates a lot of the things we do and buy.  Billions are spent on pills, potions and procedures. Even after death, more money is dumped into preserving bodies from becoming rotting carcasses. It’s been that way for millennia. I’m looking at you, Egyptian Pharaohs.

Look at those big things, and what they did to the bodies *gag*. That’s how uncomfortable people generally are with the idea of dying. So why the heck would anyone want to know when they’re dying?  How morbid a countdown to the final year, month, week, day and hour to one’s dirt nap.

Okay, it’s early in the morning, and I’m going on almost zero sleep, so some convoluted stuff is coming.


Even if someone knew the date of their demise, wouldn’t they instinctually try to avoid it anyway? Jumping off the whole “we control our destinies” idea, if anyone was told the date they were going to die, they would probably spend that entire day trying to cheat death. Since humans are big fat death cowards, there is a high potential for success.

So, if a person successfully avoids death on their “date of death,” was it actually the date they were supposed to die? Okay, now my head hurts. Let’s leave this tangent right here.

If death was inevitable, then most people would spend their last 24 hours vacillating between a state of ennui and cavalier behavior because there is no tomorrow for them. Depression and mania will abound and affect everyone around the soon-to-be-deceased.

I tend to be pessimistic when it comes to my species, so I cringe at the thought of people knowing when they’re going to die and some of the crazy ass stuff they’d come up with to end their time on this earth. There’d probably be entire cults of people with the same date of death getting together and engaging in all kinds of nonsense. And don’t get me started on the taking as many people with them as possible crowd.

No, putting “dirt nap” on a calendar is a lose-lose for everybody. It’s best to keep the entirety of humanity blissfully ignorant about such things. Telling people who can’t even handle the fact that they’re going to die when they’re dying will only end in tragedy for everyone.

giphy8  giphy5  GIVEAWAYS (1)

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